We should all be narcissists

Last week I Googled; Am I a narcissist? And in my, apparently not so humble opinion, if you have to ask, you already know. As someone who possesses textbook “exaggerated feelings of self-importance” and “an excessive need for admiration” the Google search clarified what I have been told; it’s a spectrum and boy am I on it. A spectrum we should all want to be on.

To be clear, this not a diagnosis. With half an English Literature with Creative Writing degree to my name, underqualified is a polite way of putting it. This is a self-evaluation to shed light on what we don't talk about; the visibly and vocally overconfident. In a generation deemed snowflakes, unfairly disparaged for needing and feeling, viewed to inherently lack backbone and strength because we call for appropriate censorship, while spending too much on avocado toast and not enough investing in housing, overconfidence is not a priority. A narcissist is a label we flippantly use for the annoyance at the party and the 10 posts a day instagrammer because we don’t like them. That's not good enough.

As a spectrum, those on the lower half, can be considered to have narcissistic qualities. There’s self-love and self-adoration and narcissists often subscribe to the latter. Being in love with yourself is not easy for most, impossible for some and uncomfortable for others. But I have found myself the only, and by far easiest, person to fall for. It’s in my narcissistic nature.

“I have found myself the only, and by far easiest, person to fall for”

When I say we should be narcissists, I recognise at its most extreme it is considered a disorder which only 1% of the population live with. That is not what I want to encourage. But I argue, if we all presented the visible confidence of a narcissist, even if not genuine, it would be a good thing. We should tell people how great we are. What if, not you, but the hypothetical you, is better than everyone else at something. You are literally the best. In this situation, you are the most qualified, most attractive, most interesting, vibrant, intelligent person in the room. It seems a shame not to point it out, an injustice even. Mostly, because attributes, such as intelligence, take a lot of work. You don't wake up with jobs and families and degrees. Sadly you don't just become brilliant, you have to really try. As a narcissist you admit it. You use your “exaggerated feelings of self-importance” and “an excessive need for admiration” to do so. It’s a get out of jail free card because hiding brilliance is exhausting. A narcissist just tells it how it is.

Now is the part when you hate me, no one likes the self-aggrandizing bastard. But if being full of yourself helps you eventually become more confident, if a little narcissism lets you tell people you’re great, that’s a good thing. We should all be like me. Though of course, I would think that. I am a narcissist.